So I guess we should talk a little about what’s going on and why I haven’t been here. This blog is about me. It’s about my life and the way that I express it through writing. I write about my feelings, anecdotes, and sometimes I just leave the writing of other’s here that I find inspirational. Well, that being said, I haven’t been able to write lately. Well, at least not on here (I’ve already filled 2 journals this month!) It’s hard to really say what I’m feeling without sounding completely insane.
But I’m going to try.
Back in May, Chris went to Dallas for, what was supposed to be, a month long course to wrap up his flying. After being down there a few weeks, it became very apparent that Chris had found his place; a little nest where he could grow and prosper in his career. So….. we decided to move to Texas at the end of August. That way, I would have plenty of time to get things ready and give a proper notice at my job.
A few days after Chris and I discussed it, I walked into the office at work prepared to talk to my boss about our decision. I sat down in front of her and before a single word left my mouth, I cried. I was and remain very happy for Chris, and myself. I am also very excited about all the opportunity this move will bring to our lives. But you must understand that this is not easy. In fact, I believe this is the hardest thing I’ve ever done.
In 10 days, I will be living in a new city in a new state. I’ll finally be under the same roof as my husband for the first time in four months. I’ll be five days away from starting my new job and I’ll have a new dog (haha-more on that later). I have so much to be excited about. Really, I am so excited and so proud of all that has become of this.
I also feel this very deep sadness about leaving. It’s the darkest kind that’s ever followed my heart around. It has me displaced and so heavy all the time. While there is so much to gain from all this, it will be a slightly pyrrhic victory. I’ve spent every week for the past year and 1 month (to the day!) at Pier 1. I have made a life, a career, and a family there. I have developed friendships, some the strongest and longest I’ve ever had. I’ve grown into a new person there and developed qualities I hope to maintain forever.
I know this is the right thing for me, but I will miss it.
I will miss it everyday.